again boo

we drink
we dope
we do everything we can

to be home
again

one dose
two dose
what ever it takes

to be home again

we have to double our journey
cause home is always further
once we found it
twice each time
home sweet home

we love
we fuck
fuck until we're home

we break
we dope out
and wonder if we return

we have to double our journey
cause home is always further
once we found it
twice each time
home sweet home

to be home again

to be home again

to be lost again

to be whole again

that what we do
the only damn way
to be at home

again.

New Website design Give me your commends!

After a long time of pondering and countless draft, i decided to break my old habits of not releasing a design that i am not totally satisfied. This cause great delay to the launching of my website. Yet i know, some has to be out NOW. Thus i gather what ever knowledge i have and created this website using iWeb and Bannerzest http://www.aquafadas.com/en/bannerzest/ which simplify my work flow. I'm happy to say once this site is up i did get serveral customers. Feels fantastic!

My concept derives from the concept of separating my operations in to two sections. One ( The white ) mainly for Design and advertising, and the other (Black) for photography. Maybe been an Apple fan for so long, the white and black iphone, push me to want a website that is black and white.

www.mcky.sg and www.mckydesign,sg


www.mckyphoto.sg and www.ampm.mobi


I was elated when my site came up at the number one spot in google and yahoo search. But it seem to have dropped recently. Gotta do more updating for it to climb back up.

I will be talking about my new portfolio which i am so excited about. It will appear in The singapore Tatler Cover gate fold in December.

Stay Tune Friends!

another lyric. high obviously during the 2005

music that tingles,
that.

substance of fun,

in little packages of pink, white or blue,
diamond, round or oval.

i'm so happy with my sound system (it vibrates smoothly)
i'm so happy with my find
i will be floating in a moment

but i'm missing one thing



my flying partner

i feet so lonely going to that place alone
seeing something brilliant and bright
experiencing that nice hollow swirl in my chest
and comfortable breathing
without you

my flying partner


our wonderland...
always seems like the next stop.

some older stuff i wrote eons ago.

we love the same music,

that's was the good bet to start out first conversation

and then the rest happen


we make cassettes of our fav songs

there was no ipods

maybe cd roms

and write them in 2x speed


it's strange however,

on the break up songs we were so crazy about

the car and time after time

and when we hear them now
it fits our current situation


and when you're lost singing to the song being boring yesterday
i try to sing along

trying to appear to be lost in the song
but i'm just listening to you, and lost in you face


you turned around and say
:"at least we still have same thing in common yah. Our taste in music."

okay....

2 boos makes?

so what if we still call each other before we fly

so what if we call each other boo

so what when we admit what we had was special

so what if you’re still the one i want



we still carried on our little word games

we still occasionally get’s on each’s other’s nerve

we’re still ready to be there for each other

we’re still prepared to spoil each other



you’re still the face that appear when i listen to my fav song

you’re still the one i imagined proposing to



we had something still

lighting a cigarette and not smoke it

brewing a cup of coffee to be left cold

play a touching tune and left the room empty



2 boos make something
or nothing?

Half a year gone, some updates.

This year, I became an event photographer, This year, I finally produced my company website myself thanks to iWeb 06. This year, I finally dye my hair and peps seems to like it. I gotta dye it again.
This year, My shopping curse still lingers, but at a more controlable pace. ( I had made peace with myself )
And Transformed to other bad Luck. ( Car accident, Car break down and bagage delay thanks to the toatlly incompetent tiger airways. Broke my phone and discover that it is a used phone according to nokia suntec. )
This year I will be moving and at an happier mood. The current house brings back only sad memories. Death of kin, the most painful health problem that I've ever encounter, scaryiest supernatural encounter ever in this house!

But then again like my great pal JK has said: 因祸得福. Or small bad luck in successions takes the big ones away.

Tiger Airway incident may make me 1000 bucks richer
Nokia repair my cracked LCD for free
and all these teach me to take things easy. Small thing after all.

Half the year has gone, some special pal became closer (Aspi, Michelle and the nafa gang) , some i distant (My Indian best pal and the dissy king) . I learned to be closer to those who makes me happy, and farther from those who leeched on me and care shit about me.

And I have to say:" Life is good!"

More feeling shit.

much like the sweets you like to take
never knowing when to stop
much like me you kissed at haste
crowned as king, throned on top
Does the same sweet leave a bad taste in your mouth?
much like me you had enuf
That's how far we went
That's how long your liking for sweets
:"I heard you go for fruits now?"

year 2000, in army the shit i wrote :P

I lay in the palms of your hand
slowly
melting away
How your warmth removed little bits off me
everyday
I lay willingly not threatened by logic
that i may lose my form or what made me
I was never one who conformed nor please
now I'm just an amazement
even tho I don't last in the presence of you
I don't last in the mist of you.


More shit as I dig into piles of papeer shit

bet your stake
My magical being
Be amaze of what life can be
when
what appears to hurt
cures....
what appears to sooth
poison
The world is a multi tempremental camelion.

Have fun.

Like me, Just like me.

So on so what
To this and that
Bounce off and back
And to return again

All things that rise must fall
And all things that burns must seized
Like the day must come to night
And some nights stay longer…

Like me
Like Mr. Mickey Tan
Like me, like me.

I’m used to escape into the night of sober
Where words sprang out like they aren’t mine
Scrapes of thoughts and papers printed by my heart
The true voices that I hear the next day

And found solace

That someone within knows me
That he hurts like me
Hates and love like me
He’s one but not the same

He’s me without restrictions
The one that sprang out with help of drink and smoke and pills
The one that I become less and less often
Maybe I over walked that channel that door
And that pain strikes when I swallow the key
And the weights of the doors are hard to pull apart

I touched my neck feeling for the source
And pray never to confront it

Something for Father's Day

A day to my birthday, 2003, and typing

Your second son was born
must have touched my head
how smart i would be
a part of you live in me
now you're gone.

how was the weather like that Oct afternoon?
did you know it's a boy?
how long did you think of what to call me
the youngest of the family

never was there a memory of caringness on days any other
nor birthdays celebrated
Instead you never fail to part with your hard earnings
on the toys I've got once in a while.

The books, the fees, the computers when rams are sold per mb.
all for the future you let me choose
and the support unrelentless
You tried your best when your pockets empty
yet till the end i have paid no toll nor due enough.

and all the times when I'm down with fever so high
when I'm not able to walk or stay much awake
I remember you come in before you work
and put your hands on my head
the most recent time when I'm sick
you did the same, hoping for my recovery

the last and only time i place my hand on you head
you were motionless and cold
I was hoping for your recovery
that never came.

And now you're gone
I'm left with debts unpaid
words over due
and promises un fulfilled

What's left is the little memories
of the man that gave me life.
and that maybe I would pay my debt
when I have a son.

If I ever...

It's just time, spent

what words are left to be written
from someone who believes in nothing much
all brought on by he's inability to believe in one thing
himself

even as he writes
he sigh at the thoughts of his pitiful number of words he knew
the kind of writing that'll never find praises nor interest any soul
and in that thought that say
what is the whole point?
Who's going to read it.
even you yourself would not

With that I shall stop my typing
just some time I spent

Thats all.

A song I wrote

I wonder where were you
All the time when I'm at my most
Spontaneous
Sexy

How come the groovest always plays
on my internet radio with you far away,
Those sound that would spin us round and round
with endless bolt of touch,
silent movements

and we

will add breathing to the rhythm
.....

And now another one of those songs,
Damn the DJ or blame it on the little time we had,
another danceable tunes.
I could feel you forget what we've become,
and be ourselves.
.....

And when I'm at my most drowsy,
so needing touch
Where were you,?

All the time when I'm at my most
Spontaneous
Sexy.....

As I emerge as me once again to someone new,
where were boredom,
And slow paced seem like light,
At my most.....
Spontaneous
Sexy
......

You were my impromptu sex,
My pleasure at the stairway, indulge the night away,
You were my picnic buddy, did we need to eat out so often?

With my jacket as our shelter, your flashbacks of your dream of fishes,
Brazilian bands working hard, our lips were worked too,

Now where have you been,
Spontaneous
Sexy
You.

2006 New corporate Identity

animated version

Hum... Feeling

Low and heavy clouds, reflection on the water and magic hour. iLike.

letter from a not so old friend 06

I don't particularly remember us syncing, especially when it comes to conversation. Spontaneous maybe, the stairways, the kayaks, roofs and sand. But yet all this by far, showed a very challenging time, like making windoz talk to a mac or visa versa. You can sync them, but are they really ... talking? When an specially invented language were made between us, like lyric-less rhythm of todays chillouts, grooves. Meaningless to most.

I was a modern dancer under A Drama center for close to 2 years, i can't keep my my feet firm when listening to the Groove Salad (Soma FM), I use to know all the MJ moves that I'm so afraid to disclose now. And anyone who have been with me to zouk will either think of me as a freak or follow suit. And yes, I have success hitching on to girls on occasion who dances as crazy as I.

What set me thinking about us today? And about dancing? Was the last conversation about the prospect of us doing salsa together before you head back. Believe me, I am losing blood in my hands typing this, cold hands. ********, the irony is, do you ever recall us dancing together? Like really dancing? The most it have ever come to is the "Couple Dance" at pubs, more public foreplay than anything else if seriously speaking. Hell, I've even dance more R&B with my buddy's GF than with you.

Hum... spicy, zesty, energetic and sensual partner dance. Many considered a "street dance" as it is free and spontaneous. Passion, passionate, have you seen those Latin and Afro-Caribbean dances? Salsa is similar to Mambo in that both have a pattern of six steps danced over eight counts of music. The dances share many of the same moves. In Salsa, turns have become an important feature, so the overall look and feel are quite different form those of Mambo. Mambo moves generally forward and backward, whereas, Salsa has more of a side to side feel. Hum... do you remember at Viva Brazil 1999? You bet, we didn't dance then either.

Who invented salsa? The Cubans, Puerto Ricans
*Flashback Viva Brazil* Dreams of fishes, music in abandance, beers and tapping of the rain from the jacket that sheided us.

Our little adventure with the old folks in the mist of cha cha, ballroom dancing and folks singing Chai Qing and Teresa Teng, and the upbeat uncle giving us an advice. A dance will either re-ignite two as one, or break you. He then recall instances of aged couples that fought soon after, and couples that sparks once again. My guess is, dance, bring out what's inside, truly.

My friend, all I by partaking this event, on a lighter note is to lose my belly, is to reinforce our friendship. We shared a large chapter of our lives together and might as well take on a more successful role as friends and maybe buddies. To add another extension to our lifes and add another trophy for the been there category. I know you feel the same way too, except for the belly part.